July 2: pobody’s nerfect!!

 So many blessings today! Went for a hike with William first this this morning up to the Christmas tree. It was already warm at 7am, but a nice hike, great company, and I jogged part of the way back down. Gonna try and hike that every day except Sunday and holidays. We tidied the yard and mowed. It’s looking pretty good in spite of the drought. We’ve got lots of sunflowers growing in our garden. And raspberries. The older boys had a few arguments today and I got really frustrated and yelled and felt bad. I think the heat got to us. And Peter was tired. He took a long nap in the middle of the day, which is very unlike him! Had a chance to apologize and talk through things today. Decided to try my best to not try and control others feelings or make them feel happy all the time. Working on it. They need to feel what they are feeling and work through it just as I do. I can be there for them and let them know I love them through it all. And try and sometimes give them helpful ideas to work through their feelings. But I can’t feel them for them, or remove them. And I shouldn’t try. Had a good therapy session today. Gotta feel the feels. And hand my troubles and burdens and issues from the past to the Savior. I can’t just say I’m giving it all to Him without handing it to Him and going through the that process. He loves me. He can help me with that. He can help me let go, but first I have to make sure I’ve picked it all up to give to him. Went grocery shopping and bought a new planner for July-July. An academic planner. I love it. Also got a beautiful turquoise bracelet. And returned a dress than didn’t fit. The boys all got their bikes fixed up with Ryan. And went for a ride. Got them ready for the parade on the 4th. Had chicken curry and rice for dinner and watched Alone together. And this is Peter’s first night in his new room. It seems big, but I think he will like it and be happy there. Nice for him to have a bit more independence and autonomy. William sure likes Cadee! It’s a little crazy for me still. James is still a little kid! And sweet to snuggle with him while watching the show. I have the best family and I will do all I can to love and serve and teach and protect and help them succeed and find eternal joy. They mean the world to me. Calvin and Connie came over to shower. Melissa got home from England. Devin cash has COVID.